So yesterday was my birthday and I am now THIRTY EIGHT and therefore extremely old in that soon-i-wont-be-able-to-have-babies-not-that-i-want-to-but-what-if-i-do-later! kinda way. To celebrate said happening I treated myself to the most gorgeous 90 minute hot stone massage and the lady was so thorough she included my 38 year old mug! She even massaged my glamorously fluttering eyelids! It was quite blissful and those smooth stones... like hot liquid spreading across your skin! I have decided I should get one every single day from now on. I was also serenaded in the morning by Massie and Marcie, my roommates in the old upstate farmhouse I'm staying in for the moment, and Merissa, who was up for the weekend to install her piece for the art opening this Saturday... and that was very lovely tho somewhat disturbing, I'm not gonna lie.

(HERE IS A GORGEOUS PREVIEW OF SAID OPENING, AS WELL AS A TOUR OF WHERE I BE..)

I mean really:



As you can see from the tour and photos I have generously provided above, it is so beautiful here... and even tho people are complaining about the weather right now, I LOVE IT and think it makes everything that much more stunning. The other night I worked late on my book at the cottage, and when I left I walked, enchanted, back to the grey house. There was the most light, soft, veil-like rain falling... you could barely feel it yet it was streaming streaming down in the lights... and the long grass swaying back and forth and the trees rustling..! And there is a big old porch to sit on and watch as these big rains come down... Yesterday after my massage I took a long afternoon nap with the window open and this rain-laden breeze coming in... And even now I'm sitting here in this coffee shop and everything's all gearing up for more rain... the sky's all silver with charcoal colored clouds moving in.. It's gorgeous and strange and I love that feeling of a storm coming on... And so really.. I HOPE IT RAINS ALL SUMMER LONG!

In other news, look at this lovely little article. I like the photo too and have decided to pose with lemons in the foreground from now on, at all times. Oh and a few nights ago we had a big dinner and maybe 20 or 25 women came and we all ate and then sat around the cottage living room and I read a snippet from Rain Village and a bit more from Godmother. I have to say, after reading at Trillian and Kyle's in Philly last month and then here... it is so much nicer to read in those intimate, homey settings, sitting on a couch cross-legged with people gathered around. It feels very warm, very old-time storytellery, like we should all be sitting around a fire. I love that!

Finally, here is a photo of the most byootiful and glamorous dog in the world. She is a very old lady, but she is still spry and always, always dainty in her movements. In fact, recently my friend Rob came to visit and we were glamorously doing a JIGSAW PUZZLE and when one of the pieces seemed to be missing and he speculated that "maybe the dog ate it," I didn't have any idea what he meant at first. And then I realized he was referring to MUMU.

"A dog"! As if she would be caught dead with a puzzle piece in her mouth!!! I mean look at her!



If some Dom Perignon or some truffles went missing, then MAYBE.

I forgot to share with youse the beautiful ad Massie made me for the FAERIEWORLDS PROGRAM:



WHICH IS OBVIOUSLY THE BEST AD EVER.

HOWEVER this the one she made that I sent in for the program:



I know. The combination of the two could just about make one faint from love and longing. Sigh.

SO I am in a coffee shop in Cornwall, NY, and have been going between here and NYC the past few weeks... still writing about mermaids and hatching 5000 other plots and schemes and plans, including preparing for Faerieworlds at the end of July, and the launch of the Godmother paperback in the UK next month.. and helping to prepare for the first big art show of the One Stone Collective next Saturday, June 27, about which I shall post later.. not to mention prepare psychologically and emotionally for this approaching weekend, when I shall turn the very MATURE sounding age of THIRTY EIGHT.

38!

I think I will be here upstate for my birthday and I might go to this witchy summer solstice ritual thing that the very cool, wondrous woman, Bernadette, who owns the local witchy store, told me about... It do seem like the kind of birthday that calls for a touch of magic... I met Bernadette yesterday and decided last night to go to her introduction to Wicca class at the shop--mainly because she's so un-hokey and cool, and because I thought all that magic talk might help me in my writing about mermaids and all, and I was right: I left there full of images of sprinkling salt and herbs thrown on fire and all kinds of other lovely things... Who don't love witches and witchy things? I mean really.

Speaking of which: last week I went into Manhattan to meet Robert Gould, the man who runs Faerieworlds and does many many other things besides, and his friend Diana Zimmerman, an ultra glamorous lady magician novelist/business lady, for drinks at the Algonquin and dinner next door (where I had one of them fancy burgers for the first time, the kind made out of kobe beef and that have braised short ribs and foie gras thrown in just for kicks.. it was the most obscene, slutty, legs-wide-open burger I ever done seen!), and it was a wonderful night, full of stories about magical Egyptian perfumes and peacock-filled Bavarian castles and magic circuses in South America and magic castles in Los Angeles and Garboesque fairies with broken wings, oh and healers who use gems and light..... So many things! AND speaking of new peoples and magic I don't think I mentioned how the week or so before that I got to meet the dashing, brilliant Lee Moyer for the first time, after knowing him and his equally dashing and brilliant wife Annaliese online for some time, at a Saturday brunch full of artist types, including the amazing Michael Kaluta, and the extremely charming Zelda Devon... After, Lee led a group of us up to the Nicholas Roerich Museum uptown and we passed, on the way, the Isadora and Ida Straus memorial... in memory of this old married couple who died on the Titanic. Look: "Mrs. Straus was offered a seat in a lifeboat, but she said: “I have lived with him for 50 years - I won’t leave him now”, and they sat on deck-chairs until the end." Now, honestly!

I have also spent much time with babies recently. I saw my best friend Aoife this weekend AND ALSO attended my first bris, for one Ms. Brenna and her two twin baby boys. It was awfully traumatic, I'm not gonna lie. That rabbi explained to us how them babies don't feel a thing, they just cry because they're being restrained.. and then proceeded to elicit the most soul-splitting screams you ever done heard from them chitlins.

Anyway, so in other news here is an audio clip of me reading from Godmother that I prepared for the UK reader's guide.

And in other news, I found out yesterday that B&N will be RE PROMOTING Godmother on its paperback fiction tables from July 14 thru August 10 -- a time at which I was afraid that book would be out of stores altogether, stacked in warehouses, hearbroken and unloved... and now it's like some little prom queen, with suitors all around!

And in other, other news, look at this awesome thing from this artist.:



filled with drawings like this:


Admit you have never seen anything more awesome.

The end.

Please admire this byoootiful and extremely scary anthology I am in. My story is about LA LLORONA. It will make you laugh, cry, fall in love, gnash your teeth, and wave your hands in the air to praise the lawd above. And that's just one story out of TWENTY! Unless I counted wrong, which is entirely possible!

Love,
Carolyn

Haunted Legends edited by Ellen Datlow & Nick Mamatas TOC
An anthology of original stories inspired by regional ghost stories and urban legends, coming out from Tor (hopefully in 2010).

Table of Contents

"Introduction: Saying Boo" Nick Mamatas

"Knickerbocker Holiday" Richard Bowes

"That Girl" Kaaron Warren

"Akbar" Kit Reed

"The Spring Heel" Steven Pirie

"As Red as Red" Caitlín R. Kiernan

"Tin Cans" Ekaterina Sedia

"Shoebox Train Wreck" John Mantooth

"15 Panels Depicting the Sadness of the Baku & the Jotai" Catherynne M. Valente

"La Llorona" Carolyn Turgeon

"Face Like a Monkey" Carrie Laben

"Down Atsion Road" Jeffrey Ford

"Return to Mariabronn" Gary A. Braunbeck

"Following Double-Face Woman" Erzebet YellowBoy

"Oaks Park" M.K. Hobson

"For Those in Peril on the Sea" Stephen Dedman

"The Foxes" Lily K. Hoang

"The Redfield Girls" Laird Barron

"Between Heaven and Hull" Pat Cadigan

"Chucky Comes to Liverpool" Ramsey Campbell

"The Folding Man" Joe R. Lansdale

I was just cleaning up and getting ready to leave the big city and return to the farmhouse upstate and I found these heartwarming family photos which I am generously and selflessly sharing with YOU.

So... this past Christmas my parents were here and we all stayed at my sister's and one night the four of us were all in a cab heading out to do something extremely glamorous, I'm sure, and I was sitting in the passenger seat and turned around and told them to SMILE and LOOK EXCITED and this is how they looked back at me:



I also came upon this old family photo from the one time my mama decided to take us all to a professional photographer. I believe I was about 19. We were all exceptionally cheery and full of good will, especially my evil yet fashionable sister, who is off in southern Sweden twisting her body into evil yogic positions AS WE SPEAK.



THE END.

Oh! I also wanted to share this swoony review from School Library Journal:

Adult/High School—Turgeon manages to turn the classic fairy tale into a transcendental apology for the unacknowledged linchpin of the tale: the fairy godmother. Lil is an old woman, spending her days eating, sleeping, and working at a used bookstore in New York City. Her failure to get Cinderella to the ball has haunted her for centuries. No one knows who she is or why she has been exiled from the fairy kingdom to live out her days as a human, strapping down and hiding her beautiful fairy wings. But when the opportunity to once again pair a lovely, deserving woman with a handsome prince presents itself, Lil believes that maybe, just maybe, this is her chance to go home. The story and its characters are unveiled in alternating flashbacks and present time and carry readers along to a jaw-dropping, unexpectedly melancholy conclusion. Is Lil really who she believes she is, or has she created her world out of fairy dust and whole cloth? Teens who expect a fluffy, chick-lit read may be disappointed with the magically pervasive sadness of this story, but those who enter with an open mind will be well rewarded.—Charli Osborne, Oxford Public Library, MI

TURGEON, Carolyn. Godmother: The Secret Cinderella Story. 288p. Three Rivers. 2009. pap. $13.95. ISBN 978-0-307-40799-3. LC 2008021054.

I've been so bad about writing here, since I've been struggling with this deadline for my mermaid book: writing, and then avoiding writing..

But now I've been writing like a mofo, and will turn in the first 150 pages this Thursday, and the whole book by the end of July. This is the first time I've had ready made editors for a book, tho, and not one but two, from two different publishers (and countries), which makes it more exciting and of course MUCH more intimidating.

Here is a teeny mermaid preview:

Now Margrethe could see clearly: the mermaid lying next to the warrior, worrying over him. Her pale, naked torso that shifted to glittering scales as waist flared to hip. The curve of her tail like a perfectly fitted, exquisitely colored dress, with a line of oyster shells clamped onto the back. She sat up and pulled in her tail to her side. And she didn’t seem affected by the cold at all, despite her exposed, wet skin, which shimmered in the faint northern sun. But as it hit Margrethe this was the mermaid’s actual body, a feeling of revulsion mixed with her wonder and awe. What would it be like to be half a fish, she thought, and she shuddered, even as she found herself under the mermaid’s spell.

The man was sputtering and coughing. The mermaid held him in her arms, kissed his forehead, stroked his wet hair. Even from a distance Margrethe could see the look of pure, radiant love that lit the mermaid’s face as she gazed down on him.

This is what rapture is, Margrethe thought. That thing she saw come over the nun’s faces as they sat in prayer. She’d tried turning to heaven, the way the women surrounding her did, but her heart, she knew, was too tied to the earth.

The mermaid looked up and saw Margrethe then. Margrethe gasped, caught. She could see the blue of the mermaid’s eyes, as if the whole scene had become magnified, feel it inside her despite the distance between them. It was as if, for one moment, the mermaid was right there in the convent garden. Margrethe stopped breathing, could barely feel her own body. But then an expression of terror came over the creature, and with one last look at the man she turned and slipped awkwardly back into the sea.

I have other little bits of shimmery news and loveliness but I believes I must get back to writing.

Oh! Except that yesterday morning I had breakfast with and hung out with my friend David, who played me the wondrous music of Juan Garcia Esquivel. Space-age gypsy lounge music, Vegas style!

I also hung out with his ridiculous baby:



And learned that he wrote one of the best cinema characters of all time: CHI CHI in To Wong Foo Thanks For Everything, Julie Newmar.



And on Friday this interview thing came out in Shelf Awareness:

Carolyn Turgeon is the author of two novels, Rain Village, published by Unbridled Books in 2006, and Godmother: The Secret Cinderella Story, published by Three Rivers Press in March. She's currently working on her third, a retelling of the original little mermaid story. Her website is carolynturgeon.com.

On your nightstand now:

Right now there's Love Is a Mix Tape by Rob Sheffield, Real World by Natsuo Kirino, The Other Boleyn Girl by Philippa Gregory and Would-Be Witch by Kimberly Frost. And of course copies of Godmother for me to admire and wink at. (I can't help it, the British cover has glitter.)

Favorite book when you were a child:

I probably loved the Betsy-Tacy books by Maud Hart Lovelace most, though the Little House and Nancy Drew books would be close seconds. But Betsy! She was so romantic, always hanging out in trees and scribbling in notebooks. In 13 books, you follow her from childhood until she gets married. I loved her. I wanted to best friends with her.

Your top five authors:

Gabriel Garcia Marquez, Italo Calvino, Isabel Allende, Alice Hoffman, Patricia Highsmith, Raymond Chandler. I can't count.

Book you've faked reading:

In high school and college, I faked reading a ton of books for class. Like The Tin Drum, which I put down after the eel scene. Midnight's Children, which I put down after the nose picking. I faked reading William Gibson's Neuromancer for three different college classes. . . . If a book ever comes out about cyberpunk nose-picking eels, I might actually die.

Books you're an evangelist for:

I'm not sure I'm very evangelical by nature, but I've told many, many people to read Tomato Red by Daniel Woodrell (just read the first page and tell me I'm wrong) and Mysterious Skin by Scott Heim (so gorgeous and devastating, the book and movie). I'm sure I've changed (saved?) a number of lives as a result. I've also tried to get many people to read Dante and Boccaccio by telling them how un-boring and crazy and fun those old books are.

Book you've bought for the cover:

No Orchids for Miss Blandish. There's a beautiful woman's head in a glass bowl, her eyes closed and flowers falling around her. Underneath it's described as "James Hadley Chase's notorious novel of violence and brutality that has left more than 2 1/2 million people gasping!" I've since seen other covers for this book that are just as awesome. One promises a tale of "vile, ruthless gangsterism" and shows a blonde femme fatale on a zebra print blanket. I mean really.

Book that changed your life:

One summer at my grandparent's house in Florida, when I was maybe 12, I checked out Peter Benchley's The Girl of the Sea of Cortez from the tiny local library. I'm quite sure it changed my life: the girl riding the manta ray through the sea, the hammerhead sharks circling below. . . . It's a gorgeous, magical book about a girl and the sea. I read The Clan of the Cave Bear around the same time and that was just as world-changing.

Favorite line from a book:

In Baudelaire's Paris Spleen, in "The Bad Glazier," the narrator is infuriated when a glazier has no colored panes of glass, no beautiful glass, and he throws a flowerpot down on the glazier from a balcony above. The glazier falls, and all his glass is shattered. Then here's the line: "And drunk with my madness, I shouted down at him furiously: 'Make life beautiful! Make life beautiful!' "

Book you most want to read again for the first time:

Oh, One Hundred Years of Solitude, definitely. I want to re-discover me some ice.


THE END.

So I'm now in Cornwall-on-Hudson, at The Grail, staying in this old beautiful farmhouse with my friends Massie and Marcie, who live here, and two cats and a dog. I've written about this place before but it's totally idyllic: my room looks out on green in every direction... and right this second I'm sitting on a bed in front of a huge window and right below me is a deer stopped between two trees, chomping on leaves. I'm part of an art collective that Massie and Marcie started -- I'm collaborating with this amazing artist Timi in Arizona, who's making a sculpture based on a story I'm writing about a girl with a compass for a heart (the theme of the collective's first show, which will be held here on these grounds on June 27 and then stay up through the summer, is "compass") -- and spent a big chunk of the weekend helping them clean out and wash and whitewash a huge old garden shed that will be used as an art gallery. To get to the shed you walk from this house down a bright green path lined by swishing tall grass, and there are other structures here.. a cottage where work is done, another house where other women live, an old mansion that gets rented out, a hermitage for people to come to reflect in.. There are 45 acres in all, lots of woods, some ruins, etc. -- and the art show will be spread among the grounds.. -- and down the street a mile or so is the Hudson River. Anyway, I'm here to finish my mermaid book, which is due at the end of July, since this is the most peaceful place I know and the best place to write that I've found. The other night I holed up in the cottage for hours and wrote while it stormed outside and it was totally perfect. As perfect as writing can be, anyway.

I haven't had time tho to write about the last week or so... starting with the lovely lovely afternoon I spent at the home of Ms Trillian Stars and Mr Kyle Cassidy, now newlyweds!, who hosted a lovely reading/music salon in their gorgeous old house in West Philadelphia. I wish all readings could be like that: everyone talked and milled around and ate scones (made by Trillian's mama!) and drank wine and then everyone sat down and I read from my mermaid book, and then people asked questions and were talking and I ended up reading from Godmother and Rain Village as well, and THEN after a break, Nicki Jaine sat down with her guitar and played us cabaret songs, mostly ones she's written with a couple Marlene Dietrich songs thrown in, and that girl is all lithe and sweet and elegant and then she starts singing and this voice that comes out, this deep rich crazy dark soulful Dietrich-y Marianne Faithful-y voice you wouldn't even think could fit in that body, and it's astonishing, and then the song ends and she transforms back and is all light. She's really wonderful. PLUS it turns out has some good friends in Berlin -- including a girl who writes vampire novels -- to introduce me to for when I'm there this fall. Anyway, Trillian and Kyle are amazing hosts and I hope to write many books and read from all of them at they house!

Plus Kyle takes gorgeous photos wherever he is. Look!



And me, Trillian, and Nicki:



Kyle also, by the way, took my author photo:



Anyway, so after hanging out in Philadelphia for a night and day and seeing a bunch of friends, I flew down to Texas to the home of Ms. Kathy Patrick, Pulpwood Queen Extraordinaire and owner of the only book store/hair salon in the country (which is one of the coolest places I've been to). But I have to write about that later! In the mean time, I will show you the hairdo she gave me for the Charm Night Out event I went to with her and a few other authors (Lauretta Hannon, Carol Lay, and Marian Henley, all awesome) in Nacogdoches, Texas:



That is right. She plucked a fairy from a Christmas tree and done pinned it in my hair.

I was in Texas!

The end.

So I've been in Pennsylvania the past couple of weeks, writing writing my next novel (about the little mermaid), and today I'm heading to Philadelphia with my friend Barb to read from it at the gorgeous house of Kyle Cassidy and Trillian Stars. In case you don't know, Kyle is an amazing photographer who published this book and just did a book with Neil Gaiman and Amanda Palmer (not to mention did my author photo!), and Trillian is a gorgeous actress who is now starring in this, and they are the most glamorous couple ever and live in an old, sweeping West Philadelphia house with a big fireplace and a Victrola and window seats and many many cats. So this afternoon I'm going to read and Ms. Nicki Jaine shall sing old world and original cabaret songs with Ray Ashley accompanying her on the accordion. A few months ago I sat next to Nicki Jaine at a dinner and she was vibrant and light and girly and then later that night Kyle and Trillian played me some of her music and I couldn't believe that that same girl has a voice like Marlene Dietrich, rich and deep and melancholy and gigantic. I'm very excited to see her sing in person.

Then tomorrow I fly down to Texas to see Ms. Kathy Patrick, founder of the Pulpwood Queens book club and author of this and owner of the only hair salon/book store in the country, and will be on a panel at this event in Nacogdoches.

Then I fly back to NYC to see my sister off on her 6-week trip to Europe, where she will, among other things, do a walking tour of the Scottish highlands and go to a yoga retreat in southern Sweden. I know. She is very obnoxious.

Then I shall go to a big farmhouse in Cornwall-on-Hudson where Massie lives and hole up and write like a mofo until I turn my book in at the end of July.

Oh!! And I saw the loveliest film! And yesterday I bought my ticket for Berlin, where I shall be all this fall!

The end.

So earlier this week I was procrastinating on Facebook, looking up people I knew back in Michigan, where I lived from when I was 12 to 14, and then I decided to look up this boy Michael that I had a mad crush on when I was 14 and a freshman in high school. He was a senior, and on the football team, and he was pitch black and his hair stood straight straight up and whenever I passed by him he would stop and stare at me and my heart would A FLUTTER cause I just thought he was so byoootiful. And weird and deep, and all those things, because he was always carrying around notebooks and poetry, etc., and I was a sucker for that. So anyway, halfway through the year my family moved to Pennsylvania but then that summer I went back to visit and stayed with my friend Janice and MICHAEL lived near her and saw me and one night he tapped on Janice's door and lured me out of her house (which infuriated her parents, who were from China I think, and promptly made Janice my ex friend) to the park nearby and that is when I had my first French kiss. I think we also went out to see ALIENS 2 together that week. And maybe after I went back to Pennsylvania he called once or twice, but that was it, and I didn't really think of it much after.

Except now I have a big deadline and am writingwritingwriting and in these moments such things become very important and fascinating.

So I looked up Michael, and found about 5000 photos like this one:



It turns out that he is now a street preacher who goes all around the country, and abroad, preaching against homosexuality (and sexuality in general).

Sometimes it is very sad to see how people have done turned out!

So I flew back from Kansas on Thursday and am now back in NYC. It was very very fun being in Lawrence and seeing Kansas City, which I love (Tuesday night we went to the glamorous DRUM ROOM after seeing MR Gregg Todt of Federation of Horsepower playing a lovely stripped-down show featuring, among other thing, his 6-year-old son singing the Spiderman theme song), and I think Joi will be happy there. Krysztof and his adorable chitlins are pretty much perfect, and it's the kind of easy, sweet place where you can walk downtown and no place is too crowded and friends are everywhere and you hang out in people's houses and in cool little bars you don't have to push through 50000 people to get to. It's also a lovely place to be a writer I think, especially one like yours truly with a big deadline a-looming -- there are so many coffee shops where you can write all day, and it's just easy -- and if I wasn't heading to Berlin this fall I'd probably go there. But maybe I will next spring unless I want to stay me in some Europa. WHO KNOWS AS I AM LIKE THE WIND.

Oh and Wednesday we went to the GLORE PSYCHIATRIC MUSEUM in St. Joseph, Missouri, which is the weirdest, most disturbing museum I've ever been to, illustrating all kinds of barbaric old-time psychiatric treatments through the use of chipped-up wild-haired crazy lady fashion model mannequins and faceless male doctors. I mean look:













In this weird little box, please note the scotch tape used to create water, as well as Joi's admiring reflection in the glass:

Somehow we made it out alive -- alive, tho scarred eternally.

And then theremin was played for Krystof's dancing chilllen


and drinks were had


and dinner was eaten


and girls were girls and boys were boys


and all was well.

The end.

OH AND GODMOTHER WAS SOLD TO CHINA YESTERDAY!
And now I am going to get some lunch at MOMOFUKU -- please don't be too jealous.

The end.

So I just booked a ticket to Shreveport for the day after the glamorous Philly reading featuring me and Nicki Jaine at Trillian and Kyle's abode (on May 10! email me if you want the top secret address) -- I'm heading to East Texas to hang out with the gorgeous PULPWOOD QUEENS as they discuss their May pick, GODMOTHER. What exquisite taste those ladies have! I shall be staying with Kathy Patrick herself and hope to see an abundance of East Texas delights, including the scandalous grave of one Ms DIAMOND BESSIE.

Meanwhile Im still in Lawrence, Kansas. Joi, Krysztof and I left Omaha Saturday and headed into Kansas City for fondue and roller derby, then got back here in time for Easter festivities with Krysztof's gorgeous family. I mean look at these crazy chitlins:





Last night we hung out with Chris and Lydia and watched the cinema classic BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA, but I was very tired and almost died, especially when they brought out a wily RODENT they have actually named and let crawl all over themselves. They even let it race around the living room floor in a glow-in-the-dark ball! Joi was giddy with delight while I nearly passed out from the assualt to my delicato sensibility. AS USUAL. Sigh.

Oh and here is Joi, Krysztof and me at La Buvette. Have I mentioned that Krysztof's website is here?



and our friend Gregg and Joi and Krysztof a few nights ago in Kansas City:



and here is my cousin and his wife Cindy a couple nights ago in Omaha. Aren't they so cute!

SO yesterday involved these wondrous Omaha-ian activities:

-- Hanging out with the glorious artiste Wanda Ewing, who took us to her house and showed us her artwork, which involves things like these gorgeous pin-ups on wallpaper



and the art she owns and fills her house with, including this DEEP FRIED BARBIE by Brett Reif



and latch-hook pin-ups by Whitney Lee.

Wanda took Joi, Krysztof and me to Louie M's Burger Lust, which stole all of our hearts, as you can see in this photo of Wanda and me



and then we left her and visited scooter shops and bookstores and our byoooteous hostess ALICE KIM's Omaha shop TROCADERO, which is chock-full of wonders and glamour -- shoes and notecards and purses and chocolates and makeup and plates and jewelry (bracelets with bird's nests!) and really, it's like a jewelry case flung open. I exercised extreme restaint and acquired only this extremely fashionable necklace.. please do not be too jealous. It does have starfish and shells hanging from it, as well as a huge glittery fake gem. Oh and I also bought some very very glittery nailpolish and eye shimmer.

I know.



So then we had wine and snacks with Alice at LA BUVETTE, which is as I've mentioned the best wine bar ever, and then we rushed off to BARNES & NOBLE. This B&N as I've mentioned has made Godmother its hand sell pick of the month and has sold like 100 copies of it so far and has, right at this moment, about 70 copies displayed right as you walk in. Look:



Please keep in mind that almost every other B&N in this country has about 4 or 5 copies on hand, many on display tables up front along with other new releases... and this one has SEVENTY. And makes announcements about the book like 4 times a day on the loudspeaker. It is quite amazing. Apparently, this all came about because a customer named MARTHA picked up Godmother as soon as it got to the store, read it, and recommended it to the manager, STEPHANEE, who then made it the pick of the month. Here I am with Martha and Stephanee:



And here is Joi with the very passionate and awesome community relations manager MARCIA, who arranged the event:



And here is my old friend Kelly with the novelist Timothy Schaffert, whose house we all went to after for champagne and who told us about his amazing-sounding new book about a missing child who may or may not actually exist:



And here is Alice with Bill, an Omaha-ian who had emailed me about Godmother and then came out last night with his VERY CUTE niece and nephew:



It was so casual I ended up not reading at all, just meeting staff and customers and signing all them books, and it was totally lovely and obviously Omaha is the best city ever.

Today we head back to Kansas City for FONDUE and ROLLER DERBY.

The end.

So Joi, Krysztof and I drove up to Omaha yesterday and met up with my mother's cousin Joe and his wife Cindy at LA BUVETTE, my favorite wine bar. Joe and Cindy drove in from Des Moines to see us -- and now I'm dying to go to Des Moines not to mention the famous IOWA STATE FAIR -- and I hadn't seen Joe since I was 16 and went to my great grandmother's funeral in Alabama and, before that, when I was maybe 6 or 7 and Joe came to see us for a few days in Illinois and my mama, sister and I left him off at some prairie-lined highway where he was going to hitchhike to his next destination. This seemed awfulllllly romantical to us. Anyway, it was totally lovely to see them and then my friend Alice joined us -- Alice, the glamorous NYC fashionista who up and left her life two years ago to buy a princess house and open a high-end accesory store in the Midwestern city of her dreams -- and we all whisked off to dinner and it was a gorgeous eve, and then Joe and Cindy left and Alice, Krysztof, Joi and I got some vino and went back to Alice's to sit in front of the fire and watch some tv. It is very hard to leave a cozy, wondrous princess mansion once one steps foot in.

But today we shall try, and my artist friend Wanda is on her way over and this afternoon we shall all get wine and my friend the genius novelist TIMOTHY SCHAEFFERT shall come and then tonight is my reading, where I shall see my old friend KELLY whom I haven't seen for maybe 16 years, and we shall go to Timothy's house as well as to bars with CHAMPAGNE ON TAP. Both sweet and dry.

THE END.

So I have two wondrous events coming up:

First, this Friday in OMAHA I will be reading at 7pm at the B&N at 3333 Oakview Drive. Joi, Krysztof and I are heading up tomorrow.. since I LOVE OMAHA, and then I found out last week that this B&N has made Godmother its hand sell pick of the month and has 100 copies in stock..! I've been visiting plenty of B&Ns in the last week or so and they all have about 4 or 5 copies on hand, NOT ONE HUNDRED. So they are obviously geniuses in Omaha, as I have long suspected. If you HAPPEN to live in Omaha or within 10 hours' driving, you should obviously attend.

THEN ON SUNDAY MAY 10th at 4pm I will be reading at the fabulous fireplace- and victrola-havin abode of MS TRILLIAN STARS and MR KYLE CASSIDY in West Philadelphia. And the wondrous NICKI JAINE will be singing gorgeous, Dietrich-esque cabaret. And I think it will be the most lovely evening ever. Oh, and I plan to read maybe a snippet of Godmother but then mostly from the mermaid book I'm writing now, and that should be out next spring or summer (I think)... If you can come to that, please email me (carolynturgeon at gmail dot com) for the top secret address!

Actually, in between those two things, on May 7, I will be going to a book club discussion of Godmother at the State College B&N...

IN OTHER NEWS, I totally love Lawrence and Kansas City. Joi, Krysztof and I headed in on Monday and met Chris and Lydia at this awesome live play version of THE BREAKFAST CLUB, then we met up with one Mr Gregg Todt and had some drinks and we were at this one bar where you can write in chalk on the bathroom walls so of course I wrote READ DANTE as I am extremely cool and like to promote literacy even whilst glamorously getting waysted. Actually, I drank like one wine and then switched to Diet Coke. Sigh.

Yesterday we finally unloaded and returned that damn Uhaul, which seemed so monstrous and badass at first but was actually pretty I GUESS A BIT ON THE DINKY SIDE (we pulled up next to another Uhaul truck back in West Virginia and it was then that I realized I was slightly less badass than I'd thought, but still a bit badass don't get me wrong).. And Chris and Lydia whisked me to a dinner that involved FRIED CORN ON THE COB and CHOCOLATE COVERED BACON, both of which were quite delicious tho I believes roodly made me quite sick later in the eve, and then a group of us ended up watching TWO LOVERS at the adorable old timey art theater here and then having some vino.

Today I must write like a mofo as I have some extreme deadline coming up for the mermaid book, which REALLY interferes with my vino-drinking chocolate-covered-bacon-eating time. But then tonight I get to partake in a dance party with Krysztof's chillens and then watch bellydancing videos and go bowling. The best way to spend a Wednesday night I always say.

The end.

So Joi and I arrived in Kansas yesterday, after 8 lovely days of travellin, and we're now sitting in Krysztof's living room with Joi's cats splayed sluttily all around. A big siren started going off just now as I was writing this and we are debating whether it is a tornado warning or not. Those damn wily tornadoes. Sadly, I think it was just a fire truck, so no being whisked off to Oz for us. Yet. I AM here for a week and a half so there's still plenty o time.

Our last day in Memphis was great: we went to Graceland and among other things had this delightful and elegant photo taken:



It was my second visit to Graceland, and I was again overcome by the desire to hang out with Elvis and his friends playing racquetball and riding golf carts around and eating weird sandwiches involving bananas and bacon. Speaking of which, I shall soon, maybe even as early as tomorrow, partake of a Lawrence, Kansas offering known as CHOCOLATE COVERED BACON. Please do not be too jealous. The place also offers deep fried corn on the cob, which seems an apt dish to follow the fried dill pickles Joi and I both became enamored of in Memphis.

After leaving Graceland and partaking of said fried pickles on Beale Street, then, we wandered about and had drinks at the Peabody Hotel and had drinks on Beale Street whilst watching an ELVIS IMPERSONATOR and shopped for weird memorabilia and came across two postcards with Krysztof's pin up art on them, which I of course bought, and then we met my friend Stephen for sushi at a restaurant where our seat was a BED and after he took us to this crazy dance club awash in DRY ICE and BALLOONS and MIRRORS and he and I even got up and danced to YOU GOT THE LOOK by Prince and Sheena Easton and it was awesome and then we drove around and went to other places and it was a lovely, weird night overall which is how all nights should be.

Here are some photos:



















Then Saturday we went to three Memphis bookstores where I signed stock and met peoples, and then we were off to COLUMBIA, MISSOURI. I loved the drive. I loved all the driving, and I did all of it I might add, but I did like leaving Memphis and heading through Arkansas and into Missouri. I lived in Illinois from 6 months old to 8 years, and we drove to Missouri every summer to visit my grandparents, so I do got this romantic sort of longing for it and felt happy drifting through that flat terrain.

Oh, and in Blytheville, Arkansas, we stopped at THAT BOOKSTORE IN BLYTHEVILLE on River's recommendation, and I introduced myself to the lovely lady Norma who was working there and told her I'd written a book she might have in the store and would be happy to sign it and she looked at me suspiciously and found the one copy they had on the shelf and returned to the counter, setting it down, and then a minute later she realized she'd read an advanced copy of Godmother and suddenly her whole demeanor changed and she was friendly and animated and told me how much she'd loved the book and she couldn't believe I was there.. and it was very funny and sweet.

We stopped to gaze upon the Mississippi too somewhere in south Missouri, and stopped in a couple of weird little towns to get gas, places where the locals looked at us like we were some exotic kind of shimmery bugs and occasionally told us how they were wanting to move to New York because "aint nothing new happens around here" and it was all awesome, I love all those towns and wish we could have stopped in more of them and talked to everyone.

We got into Columbia late Saturday and checked into this foul Motel 6 and proceeded to drink Ravenswood wine out of plastic cups whilst watching BABY MAMA.

Sunday we met Tink's awesome aunt Jacquie and her beau for brunch, and then went out to Jacquie's adorable house, which is on a horse farm, and it was all gorgeousness and swaying grass and gloomy sky and we got to hang out with horses and meet Jacquie's crazy dogs and see her glass work -- she has a whole studio in her basement, complete with kiln, and I fell in love with her old timey glass kaleidoscopes -- and she gave us a whirlwind tour of Columbia, including its bookstores, and then we was gone, off to Kansas with the clouds gathering overhead. And we listened to Goldfrapp and the Killers and sang like dorks I MEAN ANGELS and then lo and behold we'd done arrived in Lawrence, Kansas, at the home of one Krysztof Nemeth. And then we hung out with his adorable chillen, who were visiting, and then Chris and Lydia came over and some other friends and we all drank wine and ate pizza and listened to Pink Martini.

















The end.

Oh and here is a picture of YOURS TRULY AS A PIN-UP penned by the wondrous KRYSZTOF NEMETH who awaits our Sunday arrival in KANSAS with the most bated of breaths.

So I'm sitting at the Days Inn Graceland, where the pool in the shape of guitar is roodly unfilled tho I'm planning nonetheless to sit next to it in a bikini and with a large half coconut in hand later this afternoon, crooning Elvis tunes. Right now Joi and I are in a room full of Elvis photos and with at least two Elvis movies playing on the tv at all times, and soon we shall head to Graceland. It is all extremely glamorous, obviously.

I must mention tho how much fun we had in Nashville, staying with River and Owen and Titan in their house on a hill with a roaring fireplace and a porch overlooking a whole woods-filled valley. Yesterday River, Joi and I headed into town and hit up some bookstores, where I met people signed stock -- and David Kidd even had a copy of Rain Village, making it one of the BEST BOOKSTORES EVER -- and had lunch and went to the PARTHENON and did many other delightful things and ended up that night at one of those bars on Broadway watching a great rockabilly band. Then yesterday we all headed to the LOVELESS CAFE



and had some famous biscuits



and I bought some very fashionable pink guitar pick earrings which no you can't borrow and then we went to more bookstores and then there was a huge earth-shaking thunderstorm and with the rain pouring down and the sky blazing we rode along the gorgeous gorgeous Natchez Trace, all lined with lush green and some sluttily purple legs-wide-open flowers. I do like driving in a thunderstorm when the sky goes all smoky and lightning-charged and all the greenery gets bright bright bright, and it was pure loveliness, and then River dropped Joi and me off at our UHAUL and we headed off in the storm and made our way to Memphis, where, after driving around this devillish city about 50000 times trying to find our exit, we checked into our glamorous digs and then were whisked away by my friend Stephen for a night on the town. He showed us the weird pyramid here, and Beale Street, which I was just at two months ago BUT STILL, and then we ended up at Molly Fontaine's, this sparkly and decadent bar/restaurant/clubby place in an old mansion with a sweeping staircase, and we had wine and expressed undying love for each other and the universe in general.

THE END.

And here's River, Joi, and me at the Parthenon. You'd think we'd just stepped down from MT OLYMPUS itself now wouldnt you.

So yesterday Joi and I left Pigeon Forge and drove to Knoxville, where we stopped in a few bookstores -- Carpe Librum, Barnes & Noble, and Borders -- so I could sign me some books and say hello, and we met my third cousin Nathan and his wife Claire for lunch. Nathan is my mama's cousin Kathy's son and I didn't know about him until a few days ago, but he and Claire were completely lovely and adorable, a young artist/photography/film-making couple who are, among other things, making a low-budget zombie movie set in Knoxville. I MEAN REALLY. After, Joi and I glamorously headed to Nashville. It's a gorgeous, purple-flower-lined drive until you hit Nashville and suddenly 50000 freeways pop up and start twisting about and semis try to run you down and for a second I thought we were in Los Angeles but after losing our way once -- and I don't mean in the spiritual sense except, possibly, in Joi's case -- we got back on the right road and ended up outside the city in a lovely wooden house on the top of a hill, where River and her husband Owen and their wondrous dog (and my new best friend) Titan live. River and Owen could not be more gracious and we spent the evening in front of a roaring real fire drinking red wine. This morning we had coffee on the porch overlooking the woods and cavorted with Titan, and then River returned at lunch time and took Joi and me downtown and now we here we all are, sitting in a glorious cafe. And soon we will be somewheres else.

















THE END.

So I'm writing from Pigeon Forge, Tennessee, where Joi and I arrived late on Sunday night after about 11 hours on the road. I love driving, and now that I've mastered the UHaul truck feel more confident than ever that I'd be an awesome truck driver should the writing thing not work out. And I could decorate my cab smashingly, and listen to lots of audiobooks, and meet serial killers. We drove from Pennsylvania through West Virginia and Virginia and into Tennessee, and then Pigeon Forge gleamed and winked out at us like a miniature Las Vegas and we were home.

Here we are at a gas station in West Virginia with the coolest sign ever. Please note Joi refusing to pump gas:





Here we are entering West Virginia, Virginia, and Tennessee. It is true. I can drive a UHaul truck and take riveting photos at the same time. I missed the Virginia sign as it sneaked up on us and flashed itself just after we drove through this disturbing tunnel. But everyone knows Virginia is the wiliest state.







Then yesterday we spent the day at DOLLYWOOD. Which I went to once before maybe in 1995. Now they are celebrating some "Festival of Nations" there -- as if one goes to DOLLYWOOD for a multi-cultural experience -- so we saw some terrible Cirque du Soleil-ish typa show first, then dined on (well I dined on) a turkey leg glazed Asian style with a side of stir fried veggies. I remember years ago seeing some song and dance about the history of the Smoky Mountains but now that theater was showing some band from Ecuador I think. What has Dollywood come to? Anyway, we spent the day wandering around and we rode a rollercoaster and we took this steam train ride through the mountains ("The Smokies are a neverending song that change with every season, and every pair of eyes") and we watched the multisensory Dolly movie Heartsong (where butterflies start flying through the theater and rain comes from the ceiling) and we ate funnel cakes and fried green tomatoes and kettle corn and almond brittle and we bought post cards and rode a carousel.

Here we are elegantly waiting by the side of the road for the trolley to DOLLYWOOD. Behind us, you can see the alluring sign COUNTRY HAM (the Little House of Pancakes sign is just behind), which is where we had a scrumptious breakfast involving many grits:





Here is Joi being extremely inspired by the Tennessee mountains:



And here we are riding the carousel like all the coolest people do:













Then we took the trolley back to the hotel and got back in the UHAUL and glamorously made our way to THE MIRACLE THEATER.

Now look at this awesome brochure for the "stunning musical re-creation of the life of Christ told in epic proportion":



Joi was less convinced that this would be the BEST SHOW EVER so I bought the tickets and used my powers of VERBAL PERSUASION to get her to go. And it was indeed awesome. The show opens with a winged Lucifer flying over the audience from the back of the theater and landing on the stage, then engaging in a ferocious sword battle with many other winged angels and also narrating the history of creation to the audience. On a screen behind him, we see flowers opening and many exotic animales running through the jungle... and he's all expanding arms and looking up at the audience with his head bent down, his bald head gleaming and goatee dramatically pointing I-think-you-know-which-direction and his motorcycle boots clomping on the stage.

I do love me an insane over-the-top stage/passion play life of Christ, that crazy mixture of mouth-dropping hammy extravagance mixed with imagery that is (to me) genuininely powerful and moving no matter what. There were camels and horses and sheep on stage and walking down the aisles of the theater, tons of angels flying and swooping around, lots of dancing and singing and even a boat bucking and swaying across the stage during a thunderstorm.. There was Lucifer cackling and strutting about with a snake around his shoulders, listening in on people and hissing in their ears.. There was Jesus glowing white and performing miracles and calming a deeply slutty Mary Magdalene convulsing at his feet.

And of course there was the whole crucufixion scene, full on lashings and crown of thorns and crosses being risen, and it was as over the top as it could possibly be but also weird and moving and breathtaking and it was all extremely awesome, and the audience cheered during the resurrection scene and during a final battle where Jesus conquered Lucifer who then dissolved in a puddle like the Wicked Witch of the West.

Awesome.

Today we're heading into Knoxville to visit a few bookstores and have coffee with my second cousin Nathan and his wife Claire, and then we wend our way to NASHVILLE, where we shall spent the eve in a house on a hill in the woods with my lovely friend RIVER JORDAN.

THE END.

So Joi and I left Brooklyn yesterday and drove to Pennsylvania, and today we drive to PIGEON FORGE, TENNESSEE. Joi is, if you do not remember, moving to LAWRENCE, KANSAS, for true love.

Here are some photos before we go:

Also, here is a photo of the wondrous and debonair KYLE CASSIDY reflecting on the very deep themes in his favorite book:

So I am verrrrrrrrrry glad that my readings are over for now, and that tomorrow Joi and I head off in our UHaul on a big adventure. Last night was fun -- I read at the Tribeca Barnes & Noble -- but I felt a little more nervous than I thought I would, and then it was a good turnout but tons of people ended up canceling at last minute or emailing me today to apologize for not being able to come. After, a few groups of us headed to Lucky Cheng's and it was very very fun, and my sister and Ms Trillian Stars and I headed home around 1am I think, and Trillian stayed over and this morning I introduced her to the wonders of The Millionaire Matchmaker. It was all extremely glamorous.

Here are some glorious photos.





















The end.

I forgot to link to this essay I wrote for Beatrice.com.

So I had a really lovely reading on Monday night at Webster's Bookstore Cafe in State College. My mama made some very pretty white cupcakes with white cake mix and white frosting and white sparkly crunch sugar stuff on top and they were like CUPCAKES FROM HEAVEN ABOVE, and my sister was down from NYC and we had a big dinner beforehand with some friends and then, since I knew that about half the people coming had already been to my reading at the State College Barnes & Noble a few weeks before and I didn't want to read the same exact passages to them, I decided last minute to just read a couple of short scenes from Godmother and then read two big chunks from my mermaid book, from the opening two chapters (and the only two chapters written!). And as I was reading them I was thinking oh this is too long, and I should be reading from Godmother, this is a mistake, and then to my surprise it seemed like everyone afterward only talked about how much they liked the mermaid stuff. Even people I didn't think would like anything and were just there to be supportive. I think people reallly like mermaids. Not to mention mermaids swimming in big storms with shipwrecked men dropping around them, trying to save themselves a prince. WHICH IS AWESOME.

Speaking of mermaids, it looks like that book will probably come out next summer, 2010.. If not then, maybe a little earlier. And I have some due dates for handing the book in, first the opening 150 pages and then the whole thing, that will completely require me to WRITE EVERY DAMN DAY and actually be disciplined and hard working for once. It's exciting, because there's no reason I shouldn't be writing pages and pages a day (actually I only need to write about 2 pages a day to meet these deadlines), I just don't. And I'm feeling especially lame about that since lately I've been answering all these interview questions and everyone always asks about my writing schedule and I always say UMMM WELL I ASPIRE TO HAVE ONE and then they always say "Oh you just write when you're inspired" or "You need to wait for inspiration to come" and that's completely not true, actually, I can always sit down and write, I know what I need to write, especially now when I have a whole book to write and I know exactly what the book is -- and if for some reason I'm stuck.. the way to get unstuck is just to sit and write, anyway -- the fact is I just don't write in a disciplined manner because I'm not disciplined. So now I have to be, which is good. I've not really been in this position before... I mean I wrote and sold Rain Village and Godmother when I had a full-time job and now that writing is my full time job I gotta start treating it like one.

Oh! So I should be turning the book in October 1, and after that I shall immediately turn back to my Dante book and get a proposal together for that.

In other news, last night I saw Sunshine Cleaning, which was quite good.. Tho when a guy selling a van tells the main character's kid that if he talks into a CB his words will go "out in the heavens" you know there's going to be a cheesy ass scene on the way where said kid talks on said CB to said heaven. Which was bad enough. But then in a climactic moment the main character also talks on a CB to heaven -- "mom, can you hear me?" -- and THAT IS JUST DOWNRIGHT INEXCUSABLE.

NO CB CALLS TO HEAVEN!

That is my hot writing tip of the day. That, and be more disciplined than yours truly.

Now I am at my sister's and I have no plans today except to WRITE TWO PAGES and then luxuriate in the bath and in front of the tv because tonight is my NYC Barnes & Noble reading and it is a little nerve wracking. And then Saturday morning Joi and I head to the highway and into the wild blue yonder.

The end.

A gorgeous reminder!

Mayfly photo Hannah just sent:



I guess it is quite pretty. For a bug.

My last few days were incredibly social, and now I feel chock full of stories and wonders. I had lunch Friday with my old Italian professor, Dr. Triolo, and amongst other things he told me about attending the Palio horse race in Siena in 1961 and seeing Sophia Loren there..! And I had dinner with my old schoolmate Chuck and his gorgeous wife Rowan, and they make lustrous pottery and travel all around to fairs and festivals selling it, and I learned all about this crazy life they have and about the elaborate over-the-top lengths people go to at these festivals, like for the Society for Creative Anachronism's Pennsic event, where one "baron" builds a whole palace complete with chandeliers and running water. And Sunday I met this art professor James and he showed me these beautiful hard plates and jewelry he makes entirely from paper, and told me about this show he'll be having in Pittsburgh this fall where he'll be presenting a series of artifacts from the fictional perspective of a 24th century curator. And I had an interview for the Centre Daily Times and hung out for a while with the interviewer and photographer after, learning about the seedy dealings the one uncovered during her time as a reporter in Buffalo/Niagara Falls, and the foray into coupon-cutting the other has recently begun with adorable and breathless abandon. And I had dinner with my sister and Barb and Jill, and then my sister and I went out for drinks with our old friend Hannah and we ran into more old friends, Jim and Ted, and Hannah is now getting her PhD in etymology and is conducting this huge study about mayflies and is trying to re-introduce them into this creek here that they once populated and then disappeared from. Mayflies! She said mayflies are the most beautiful and most ancient insect, and that the kind she studies come out at night, only one week a year, and have these white abdomens as adults that make them glow as they gracefully dip into the water and fly up again. Now I am no bug lover myself and roodly yet glamorously exclaimed "ew!" a few times as she spoke, but how can one not be swayed by the passion of a girl who loves mayflies and lights up when describing them. When I'm back here in May, she's promised to take me down to the creek to look at them.

Please don't be too jealous.

The end.

So I have been in PA this last couple of weeks, doing lots and lots of work and seeing lots and lots of movies, plus I did the Master Cleanse for 7 days last week, which means NO FOOD, just this lemonade drink, and it's supposed to detoxify you and do all kinds of wonderful things and and it was surprisingly easy and I was surprisingly clear headed up to the last day, when I thought I might die and weird bumps appeared on my fair and delicato skin. So I thought maybe those are the toxins leavin mah body but if that's the case I want them to get back in there and GET OFF MY FACE. I basically holed up in my parent's house because I was watching their dogs while they were off in the Caribbean, and I sat by the fire and played with the dogs and wrote and had friends over and watched wondrous things like the original Friday the 13th, parts I and II, which I'd never seen, in the dark with friends and with the fire going. It was a lovely week, considering I was starving, and then I totally broke the fast in the wrong way, by eating wheat crackers, due to said skin trauma.

And last weekend I wrote this story about La Llorona-- the crying Latin American ghost lady! -- for the anthology Haunted Legends, edited by Mr Nick Mamatas and one Ellen Datlow, coming out next year, and I almost never write short stories but I had this one in my head and I wrote a few pages of it months ago and so sat down Saturday and wrote all day and late into the night and then finished Sunday morning and Nick rooooodly suggested some edits including cutting some of the "Wow, Mexico sure does smell nice!" stuff, as he roodly put it, and now they have done accepted it and I am happy.

And THEN yesterday I found out my US publisher -- Three Rivers/Crown/Random House -- is making an offer on my mermaid book, book 3, very likely titled The Sea Queen, which was bought last summer by my UK publisher Headline, and I was very very nervous they might pass given the economy and state of publishing generally, but they did notta thankgod.

Upon learning this news, and upon my paranoiac brain realizing I do not have to immediately send out resumes and try to get a job, I emailed a friend of my friend Rob who has an apartment in Berlin and said YES I would like to rent said apartment for September and October, maybe longer if I like it. This has been a plan of mine for a while, tho I've never been to Berlin. But my friend Eric is madly in love with the city and has told me about for years now and has convinced me many times over that I must must must go there, that it's a city I will love for about 500000 different reasons, not least of which is that it has that wild, wonderful energy of New York in the 70s and 80s. SO I AM. AND I might stop in London on the way over to meet my publishers there and do whatever else I can, maybe a signing, and of course laugh at the funny accents.

Yesterday I ALSO solidified my plans to attend FAERIEWORLDS this summer -- this huge crazy event held on a winery half an hour outside of Eugene, Oregon, where thousands and thousands of people come to celebrate fairies and other "nature spirits" apparently, and where tons of vendors sell magical typa things and there are all kinds of bands and artists and whoknows what else, since I have never gone and in fact have never gone to any festival or convention like this ever. HOWEVER, I cannot help but notice that I have written a book that has FAIRIES in it, and as I feel that anyone who puts on a pair of wings or some antlers and goes off into a field to dance around really should be part of my target audience, I am going to go with many books in tow, and I'm going with Signe Pike, as I think I've mentioned, a lovely writer and editor whose book Faery Tale: One Woman's Search for Magic in a Grown-Up World comes out next year, and yesterday I rented a booth and did all that crapola and I'm gonna share it with LANA GUERRA and JESSE RENO and it shall be very very fun. And weird. And I'm gonna try to infect all in attendance with Godmother. And I'm writing about it for the Powell's blog. And I'm taking video which shall be used for my reader's guide that shall come out this summer when Godmother is released in paperback in England.

Speaking of which, LOOK:



I just got these a few days ago, the hardback is on the right and the paperback on the left -- here they are making out in front of the fire -- and the glitter on the paperback looks amaaaazin.





ALSO: next week I head back to New York, after having a reading here Monday night -- oh! I think I forgot to write about the reading I had on March 4, which was lovely.. -- and then the NYC reading is next Thursday, with a big party after at LUCKY CHENGS for my book and Joi's leaving NYC for true true luvv, and then SATURDAY Joi and I vamoose in a UHAUL truck, and we go to Dollywood, and Nashville, and then in Memphis WE'RE STAYING AT THE DAYS INN GRACELAND WHERE THERE IS A POOL IN THE SHAPE OF A GUITAR and free Elvis movies showing constantly. And then we head up to Columbia, MO, and then Kansas. And I shall stay for a week and a half and help Joi get settled and check out Kansas City and we're also taking a trip to OMAHA. I think I've already written about this itinerary but to me it is like a POEM that should be repeated as often as possible.

I'm about to head off to lunch with my old Italian professor, but real quick let me just say here are the movies I've seen JUST THIS WEEK;

-- The Reader, which made me cry cry cry and was lovely lovely lovely
-- The Watchmen, which felt to me like something written in some other, weird language, as I have not read the graphic novel or in fact any graphic novel front to end, but was entertaining enough
-- Wendy and Lucy, which is a tiny, heartbreaking movie about a girl and her dog
-- Last House on the Left, which, I'm not gonna lie, I liked a lot. I don't think I've ever been so tense watching any movie ever.
-- Gran Turino, for the second time, because Clint Eastwood is awesome and I love him and I have ever since BRONCO BILLY

OK THE END

Look at this wondrous review from the Boston Globe:

Carolyn Turgeon's "Godmother" could be read as a dark fairy tale or the fantasy of a literate madwoman, or both. Bearing the tagline "The Secret Cinderella Story," this ingenious novel is narrated by Lil, the fairy godmother who was responsible for preparing Cinderella for the ball where she would meet Prince Charming. In "Godmother," the story behind the fairy tale is a gloomy business. We've been led to believe that Cinderella and her prince lived happily ever after, but in this imaginative retelling everything went awry, and the fault was Lil's. For her misdeeds she has been exiled to Manhattan, a far cry indeed from the fairy kingdom. The elderly Lil lives alone in a deteriorating walk-up in the garment district. Every morning she binds her wings with an Ace bandage and goes off to work at Daedalus Books, a used bookstore in the West Village. She loves the bookstore, but it can't compare to her lost life in the enchanted lake. She longs to return home. When she meets Veronica, a beautiful, vivacious young woman with a history of romantic disappointment, Lil imagines that she can redeem herself if she can find Veronica the right man. "Godmother" is steeped in nostalgia for a lost New York, a glamorous place as fictional as the fairy realm. Turgeon writes beautifully. She tells this deliberately ambiguous story with delicacy and wit. This is a magical novel, in many ways.

!!!


Also, look at this beauteous collage my friend Heather made. I went to her lovely wooden house in the boondocks on Friday morning for coffee and talking and I fell in love with this. But she's always made gorgeous collages.




In other news, I am now on the second day of the Master Cleanse.

That is really all my news.

The end.

So my reading on Wednesday night went very well and I was nervous because I'd only picked out the little bits I was going to read over lunch that day with Massie at HOSS'S and wasn't all that well prepared, but I am so much better speaking to a crowd now than I was for Rain Village, so much more relaxed and more focused on the audience's experience rather than my own nervousness, and it went swimmingly and I think about 50 books were sold and since I went to high school and college in State College there were lots of old friends and old coworkers from the Diner where I worked from age 17 till 25 or so and my great old Italian professor who first taught me Dante and many of my parents' friends, and so on. And there were red velvet cupcakes. And my mama made adorable bookmarks with glittery stars on them, and I had a bowl full of glass slipper tattoos, and when someone asked about the accordion I promised that by the next book, the mermaid book, I would play a full on mermaid song that would make you feel like you'd done slipped underwater and grown fins.

Oh and the community relations manager Meredith wants to have a book club meeting for Godmother, and we scheduled that for May 7, at which time I will be staying up in Cornwall-on-Hudson for a few months but will come back to PA for a visit.

Also: Thursday Godmother came out in the UK (and I think across Europe), in hardback with the lovely glittery cover, and I came home yesterday to find a byooootifull huge bouquet of flowers sent from Headline, my publisher there. The paperback comes out there in July and they're putting together a reader's guide which shall, among other things, include lovely fairy recipes and audio and video clips provided by yours truly.

Yesterday I was feeling quite down, I have to say, probably just drained from all the stress and nerve-wrackedness from bookly things, which makes me even more quick to delicato tears than usual, and so I went to lunch with my mama and later out to see MALL COP with Massie and her mama, and Massie made me a card with a photo of the MALL COP on the cover to cheer me up.

I mean really.

And now I have slept about 5000 hours and am going to watch my parents' dogs for 8 days while they are in the Caribbean and plan to write write write in this house alone and also do the MASTER CLEANSE, starting today. This is a rare opportunity for self-enclosure. Cause soon there are more readings and then a two-week road trip with Joi out to Kansas and then Cornwall and then a trip out West for FAERIEWORLDS and then come fall I plan to spend a few months in BERLIN.

The end.

I like this review from here:

03-03-09: Carolyn Turgeon Wants to Introduce You to Her 'Godmother' : A New York Fairy Tale

Anybody who reads this column regularly probably knows the employees at their local independent bookstores. But how well? Carolyn Turgeon imagines in 'Godmother' (Three Rivers Press / Crown / Random House ; March 10, 2009 ; $13.95) that there's quite a bit we may not know about the employees of our favorite local bookstores.

In the opening pages of 'Godmother', readers meet Lil, an old woman who works in a used bookstore. Readers will recognize themselves in the character, just the first of many clever turns by the author. Lil loves the smell of old books — don’t we all? Especially in bookstores. And as well, Lil loves the whole "Found" Magazine aspect of books, those little notes that sometimes drop out, grocery lists of ancient "I love you" messages. It's a pretty good gamble that people who read books will like to read about other people who like books as much as said readers. And that they'll empathize with booksellers. With careful, lush language and evocative prose, Turgeon puts readers in the first-person perspective of Lil with complete confidence.

Of course, it turns out that Lil has wings.

And no, thank whatever bearded deity you happen to impose on a cloudy sky, she's not an angel. She's a Fairy Godmother with a shameful past. It's the Godmother aspect that gets her the huge feathered wings; otherwise, she might be ready to apply for a supporting role in the NY Opera version of David Cronenburg's The Fly — because most fairies apparently have insect wings. And the shameful past, well, it has to do with a lass named Cinderella, and the unfortunate role Lil played in the what actually transpired but has been you know, cosmeticized by earlier authors.

Turgeon doesn't play her fairytale New York for laughs. Instead she immerses readers in a sensual, visceral world that happens to include a variety of magical creatures which she renders as believable characters. Once the fairies are real, they can complicate the plot in ways that humans cannot, which allows Turgeon the opportunity to play with plot imagery and characters in a rather unique manner. She can have fun with a purpose, use the fantasy tropes to tell us not about fantasy, but about reality. She manages to do this while telling two stories in the space generally allotted to one.

Readers will have to be on their toes to find 'Godmother.' It's a trade paperback original with a rather bland cover that's not likely to get shelved with genre fiction and not likely to be noticed with literary fiction. It belongs on both sets of shelves, really, which is verboten in today's bookselling climate. It's worth the search (and you should look for it at your local independent — I mean, the main character does work at an independent bookstore!), no matter what your literary inclinations are. It has the surreal aspects of the best genre fiction and the literary chops to appeal to a much wider crowd. It's certainly fun, and moreover one of those books that is guaranteed to change the way readers perceive the world. You'll never look at your bookseller in the same light.

So I took the train back to PA from NYC on Friday--I do love me the train, those hours of listening to music and staring out at all these mysterious towns and farms and forests passing by, wondering what mysterious and diabolical things people are up to there--and then spent Saturday in State College PUTTING UP FLYERS for my reading at B&N tonight, since I can't control a whole lot with this book at this stage but at least I can try to make the readings jam-packed with people and loveliness AND RED VELVET CUPCAKES. And Saturday night I played poker with a smashing group of people who got more and more annoyed with me the more I won, and I wanted to get home early but ended up staying out late late late cause I thought it would be downright UNCIVILIZED to cut out early with everyone's moolah and if I was in a Western, which I occasionally suspect I am, I could very well get shot for such an act.. And then Sunday I went to Ithaca with my mama and her two dogs, so they could get treated at the fancy animal clinic there, and I spent hours in a Best Western typing up bookly things, like THIS DELIGHTFUL PIECE OF GORGEOUSNESS, and of course watching the shocking and pure bull crapola finale of THE BACHELOR, and then got back to State College last night just in time to elegantly collapse.

So tonight is my first of three book readings for Godmother, and I forgot how hard it is to actually pick out bits from a book to read to an audience, since moments that immediately come to mind usually need some sort of context or build up to make them so good, and you need just some very lovely and strong and alluring stand-alone bits. But here is one I think will work, and I am GENEROUSLY SHARING IT WITH YOU.

She deserves this, I thought. Suddenly, I wanted, more than anything, for this girl to find relief. She had been made for him. I was a fairy. I could close my eyes, stretch out my wings, and be back by the lake within moments. The coach was ready, the horses stamping their feet furiously, anxious to fulfill the duty I’d conjured them for. The coachman sat with the reins in his hand. And Cinderella radiated pure light. She would be the most beautiful woman at the ball.

Everything was in its place.

I closed my eyes and breathed in. “It is time,” I said. I ignored the pain pounding through me. In a few more minutes, it would all be over.

I snapped my fingers and the coachman jumped to the ground and opened the carriage door. Inside, the velvet seats were as red as blood. I turned to Cinderella and watched the dying light on her face, her skin, the ice blue of her dress.

He would take one look at her and forget me.

“Come,” I said.

She did not move. My own emotions were too strong, too ferocious, for me to read what was happening inside her. Just go, I thought. Go! I forced myself to think of the fairy lake. The water that wrapped around me like a pair of arms. The way we never felt anything at all resembling longing, because our world was already perfect, so full it brimmed over. In moments, I would be there.

Cinderella still stood, and I saw she was shaking.

She reached up just as I was about to go to her. She ripped her hair out of the swept-up bun I had conjured for her. I watched, unmoving, as the rhinestones scattered down into the grass. Watched her kick off the glass slippers. They tipped over into the grass. I couldn’t take my eyes off them.

“I am not going,” she said.

Godmother finally comes out today.

So go buy it, go write reviews of it, send it flowers, tell friends and enemies about it, write about it in yo blogs, throw parties in its honor, tell booksellers how it's changed your life, give it a big fat kiss, ask it if it'll go steady with you, send it to me if you want it signed, buy a copy for your mama and your best friend and your one true love... ALL OF THAT!!!

Thankyou.

Love eternally,
Carolyn

My temporary tattoos came in and they are awesome and if you want one I might consider sending you one.

Loooook:

From Library Journal:

Turgeon, Carolyn. Godmother: The Secret Cinderella Story. Three Rivers: Crown. Mar. 2009. c.288p. ISBN 978-0-307-40799-3. pap. $13.95. F

Cinderella went to the ball, Prince Charming fell in love with her, and they lived happily ever after. But what if the fairy godmother had gone in Cinderella's place? Such is the twist on this retelling of the classic fairy tale. For her indiscretion, Lillian has been cast out from the world of fairies and into the human world. After hundreds of years in exile, Lillian longs to return home. When she meets Veronica, a beautiful, quirky young woman with a passion for life and belief in the impossible, Lillian sees her opportunity to make amends and find a way back home. Turgeon's second novel (after Rain Village) thoughtfully peels away the layers of fairy-tale convention and delves deeper into the notion of true love—its cost, its power, its rarity, and its beauty. Romantics and fans of fairy stories of all kinds will be enthralled by this latest take on the Cinderella story. Recommended for all fiction collections.—Leigh Wright, Bridgewater, NJ

Look at Eric, hanging out with the most glamorous ladies!!






In other news, I LOVED the movie Let the Right One In -- a gloomy, lovely, emotional, snow-filled movie from Sweden about vampires that will break your heart.

I also think the finale of Top Chef was some bullcrapola.

The end.

I've joined Twitter under the incredibly original and frankly stunning name carolynturgeon. A lovely book reviewer I spoke to today advised me to. So if you are on Twitter you should obviously become friends with me. I am quite sure it will bring our relationship to a whole new level.

I also was told by another lovely book marketeering friend that it was crucial for me to sign up for Amazon Connection and so I did that too. But now I have to put things on it.

I also went to Goodreads, yet another thing I signed up for and don't check much -- of course for that site it would help if I actually read things -- and whilst there stumbled upon a reader's review of Godmother that is by far the nastiest review I've ever read of mah own glorious prose. The review ends with this line, however,

If this author offers you a nice, refreshing glass of Kool-Aid, it’s probably best to pass ...

which I think has a nice wicked witch ring to it.

And the book isn't even out yet!

In other news, I went up to Random House today to sign a bunch of books and take care of some things, and I was gifted with several other books published by Three Rivers/Crown. One was THE ZOMBIE SURVIVAL GUIDE. Another was LOVE IS A MIX TAPE, a memoir about a man who fell in love with his wife through music and coped with her early death through music too. I started on the train and it done nearly made me cry just in the first few pages.

It's almost enough to make me read again!

Listen:

Falling in love with Renee was not the kind of thing you walk away from in one piece. I had no chance. She put a hitch in my git-along. She would wake up in the middle of the night and say things like ‘What if Bad Bad Leroy Brown was a girl?’ or ‘Why don’t they have commercials for salt like they do for milk?’ Then she would fall back to sleep, while I would lie awake and give thanks for this alien creature beside whom I rested.

Renee was a real cool hell-raising Appalachian punk-rock girl. Her favorite song was the Rolling Stones’ ‘Let’s Spend the Night Together.’ Her favorite album was Pavement’s Slanted and Enchanted. She rooted for the Atlanta Braves and sewed her own silver vinyl pants. She knew which kind of screwdriver was which. She baked pies, but not very often. She could rap Roxanne Shante’s ‘Go on Girl’ all the way through. She called Eudora Welty ‘Miss Eudora.’ She had an MFA in fiction but never got any stories published, but she kept writing them anyway. She bought too many shoes and dyed her hair red. Her voice was full of the frazzle and crackle of music.

Renee was a country girl, three months older than me. She was born on November 21, 1965, the same day as Bjork, in the Metropolitan Mobile Home Park in Northcross, Georgia. She grew up in southwest Virginia, with her parents, Buddy and Nadine, and her little sister. When she was three, Buddy wa transferred to the defense plant in Pulaski County, and so her folks spent a summer building a house there. Renee used to sit in the backyard, feeding grass to the horses next door through the fence. She had glasses, curly brown hair, and a beagle named Snoopy. She went to Fairlawn Baptist Church and Pulaski High School and Hollins College. She got full-immersion baptized in Claytor Lake. The first record she ever owned was KC & the Sunshine Band's "Get Down Tonight." KC was her first love. I was her last.

A very bizarre pairing from Amazon:

So I've been in NYC the past few days, trying to get some book stuff done and doing many lovely things, LIKE FOR EXAMPLE

-- seeing a preview of my friend Eric's show 33 VARIATIONS with my friend Valerie, starring a very spectacular and kick ass JANE FONDA (and written and directed by MR MOISES KAUFMAN who directed one of my all time favorite Broadway shows I AM MY OWN WIFE and is a beautiful beautiful writer). Jane Fonda plays a scholar trying to figure out a mystery about Beethoven, so the show goes back and forth in time in a cool way and there is much gorgeous music. This is Eric's first big show as an above-the-title producer and I was done proud.

-- meeting a bunch of bookly friends for drinks and dinner, among them one MR ANTON STROUT whose second novel DEADER STILL comes out tomorrow. Here is the cover as well as our sparkling visages:





-- going to my first FASHION SHOW at FASHION WEEK with Joi and her old friend Jen AKA BEATCHIK and her nephew's wife Melissa, and sitting in the second row and seeing 50000 extremely bizarre alien beings tottering down a gleaming white space age runway wearing magnificent, elaborate clothes, like flowing gowns with big buddhas on them. I only have a certain amount of appreciation for clothing tho and was more fascinated by the models' glittering smoky eyed alien glares. AT one point I wondered if they were wearing weird silver contacts or something but I don't think they were, I think they were ACTUALLY ALIENS. OH and I did become smitten with this one pair of boots that seemed to be made entirely of glitter and was even more cool than the coolest pair of boots in the world and those of course are the boots that Madonna sees in a window and trades in her jacket for in DESPERATELY SEEKING SUSAN. Oh AND we were sitting within spitting distance, well maybe watermelon seed spitting distance, of MISS JAY from America's Next Top Model--the weird runway coach who teaches the girls to walk--and HE was sitting with some pale pale tall black haired guy in red and white stripes with big round glasses and a big red hat, and we all fell in love with him but we don't know who he is. But who don't love a gay man made of candy.

Here are some fascinating photographs, and you will notice that Michael Musto was right in front of us and if you squint squint squint in the third one you can see you some Miss Jay and the vaguest little speck of the candy man:






-- on Saturday getting a MASSAGE, followed by FONDUE and WINE with my friend Signe at one of the lovelist places in NYC The Bourgeois Pig, and then going to Brooklyn for Joi's BIRTHDAY PARTY where one MS SHEENA BIZARRE had a singing telegram sent at the stroke of midnight. Singing telegrams are awesome and really the best way to simultaneously embarrass your friends and show them you care. Please wish Joi a HAPPY BIRTHDAY if you haven't already. It's good to have a milestone birthday just before up and moving to Kansas for your one true luvv.

-- watching the horrifying OSCARS after a lovely lunch with my friend David and a margarita with my friend Anthony. Anthony, Rob, Autumn, and Joi and I sat and watched the terrifying dance numbers but also fell madly in love with MICKEY ROURKE AND HIS DOGS as well as with the dood who wrote MILK. And the adorable Japanese man who quoted Styx.

-- oh and having a long intense fancy lunch with Eric in which I cried openly in a crowded restaurant where the only person (besides Eric) in my line of vision was some character actor I recognized but didn't know the name of. I would like to think that this sort of behavior speaks to my DELICATE NATURE rather than lack of emotional stability, thankyou, and all was well and we expressed our deep love and devotion and then I went to PAPYRUS and bought beautiful pink stationary. As you do.

And I didn't even mention my many hot dates. Or the fact that I turned in the proposal for BOOK THREE to Random House. I KNOW. Slutty AND impressive!

The end.

I am excited because a couple of years ago Ms. Molly Crabapple made me this loooovely drawing



and now I have ordered FIVE THOUSAND little temporary tattoos of it.

Just because they will be awesome.

I might consider giving you one.

Also, here are some beautiful photos of my friend Heather expressing her deep and everlasting love for yours truly:







The end.

Dear Friends,

If any of youse know any book reviewers/bloggers/media types etc who should get a copy of my book, please tell me immmmediately.

Love,
Carolyn
carolynturgeon@gmail.com